Elmo’s Theory: An Anti-Gender Bender

The line from the movie Titanic goes, “A woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets.” Indeed, a woman’s heart is so secretive that even women don’t know themselves.

The rule applying to age disparity for romantic relationships.

The rule applying to age disparity for romantic relationships.

Women are often obtuse to their own condition. Men have the objectivity of not being women, and therefore have the distinct advantage of perspective when it comes to inquiries into that “deep ocean of secrets”. From that vantage point and having dealt with women in a variety of situations and circumstances, I’ve come to understand something about how women function, how they think, and in this particular theory, how they regard their choices. They are most definitely peculiar.

As an important point to consider at the outset of this discussion is Elmo’s Rule #13 which states, “Women are honourable, but respect is earned.” Women are designed to be the propagators of the species. It’s a biologic fact. As much as the feminists would hue and cry about it, the fact is that America needs American women as breeders and nurturers. As women fulfill that function, within the confines of marriage, they should be respected, held in esteem and valued for it. However, it should come as no surprise to say that feminist enablers have given women the validation to act according to their own selfish desire. As they cease to fulfill the role of propagator they become biologic dead ends. Basically, they are nothing other than men with emotional issues and due no other sort of respect. Homogamy bears the same outcome. Particularly in view of the current issues with wanton alien invasion, this becomes critical in America. The future of the U.S. is already in grave peril due to other factors. It will have no future at all if the core ideals of marriage and family aren’t preserved.

Prevailing modern thinking presumes women with career and vocational roles classically held by men as a furtherance of the misguided notion of equality of the sexes. Again as before, egalitarianism is the particular bete noire to which Elmo’s Rule #8 responds, “Men and women are not equals, nor is either superior to the other.” Men and women think differently and feel differently, not to mention their different physiology. Yet there is the prevailing ethos that somehow men and women must be equal. The present day dictates of equality of the sexes have their roots in the amalgamation of the transcendentalist, feminist and communist ideology over the last 100 years. Gender egalitarianism is just humanist utopianism co-opting Christian principles to make it palatable to the masses while fomenting ideologic war against biblical precepts. It is anathema to all that is at the core of family and marriage. 

Parenthood roles have been devalued in society to the advancement of individualism. Many young women today choose college, career or even ministry over marriage and family due to individualist doctrine. Focus on classic family values pales compared to the societal focus of personal improvement, development or satisfaction. As with other terminology in popular parlance, family and family values has been redefined and redetermined. The establishment of family involves personal sacrifice, but the emphasis on individualism has women pursuing personal goals. In addition, women are typically driven toward security. As the variety of careers, vocations and opportunities for women to provide their own security are available, marriage and family is shunned as a riskier and arduous prospect. External forces of a morally degenerative society threatens the cohesiveness of marriage and family.

Marriage as a human institution has also become degraded into a caricature of itself though the assumption of its domain by the state. In this way, ironically, the institution of marriage takes the blame for the dismal quality of the people entering it. Because of these and other factors, many young marriageable women are less interested in being married, to the frustration of men who long to be honourably married and raise a family. Men with moral imperatives and a sincere desire for a lasting marriage and wholesome families face difficulties finding similarly minded and concerned mates.

Age is a significant factor in choosing a mate. One particular yardstick of romantic eligibility is the “Half-age-plus-seven” rule, a chart for which is provided above. This basically determines a range of ages from which eligible marriage partners may be sought. As example, if a male aged 30 were looking for a suitably aged woman the rule would dictate that she should be no younger than 22 (30/2+7=22) and no older than 46 (46/2+7=30). This is more art than science, and the rule is just a guideline, but there are age limits which an individual should consider as appropriate. Imagine, for example, the perceived impropriety of a 30 year old man paired with a 17 year old female. On the other hand, in terms of life experience, consider what a particular 53 year old man should have in common with 26 year old woman.

A woman’s age is a particular marriageable factor in their biologic window for child bearing. Women typically encounter difficulties bearing children beginning in their 30s and the difficulties statistically increase as they get older. If a young man is interested in marriage he intends to marry a woman of child bearing age, generally their twenties if not late teens. But it’s clear that women are delaying if not completely avoiding the commitments of marriage and children. As example:

America’s next generation of youngsters should be called “Generation Rex.” If you’re wondering why playgrounds around the city are so quiet and dog runs are packed, a new report has an answer: More and more US women are forgoing motherhood and getting their maternal kicks by owning handbag-size canines. Data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention show that a big drop in the number of babies born to women ages 15 to 29 corresponds with a huge increase in the number of tiny pooches owned by young US women,…“Women are not only having fewer children but are also getting married later. There are more single and unmarried women in their late 20s and early 30s, which also happens to be the demographic that buys the most small dogs,” market researcher Damian Shore told Quartz.

This is the logical consequence of feminist egalitarian ideology; women self-indulgently fulfilling their irrepressible maternal instincts choosing dogs over children. In view of this and other observations as mentioned, I offer Elmo’s Anti-Gender Bender Theory, stating:

Women not already involved in a purposeful relationship leading to marriage with a man by their mid 20’s will be disinterested in pursuing any such relationship before their mid 30’s.

Assuming a woman attends college very soon after graduating high school, and because the typical 4 year university degree often takes 5 years to achieve, generally by her mid 20’s she’ll be facing college graduation. This age seems to be a critical point at which if a woman doesn’t already have a prospective suitor she will shift her focus to career, more education, ministry or some other vocational ambition once she graduates college. If she does move toward a personal ambition of the sort then marriage and family is a responsibility which can wait, or so she surmises. Unfortunately, it doesn’t wait for the men in their mid to late 20’s who are still eligible. By this time they’ve established a career track, perhaps become well-heeled and looking to parlay their lives into marriage and family. While the male builds upon his marriageability as provider and his biologic opportunity window of procreation remains nominal, the woman’s biologic clock winds down causing her marriageability to erode. Truly marriageable men can and want to provide for a wife and family and aren’t particularly interested in a prospective wife’s career or pursuits. Women often fail to see that as they leave their 20’s their estimation as wives in the view of men becomes diminished because their procreative window closes.

Then, as if awakened from a sleep, women seem to come around to the idea of marriage and family, if not again, at about their mid to late 30’s. Perhaps it is the realization of the vanity and futility of career pursuits. It could be the loneliness of not sharing life with a dedicated husband or the satisfaction of being needed by one’s children. Whatever the reason, marriage and family becomes an attractive opportunity again.

It remains to be seen whether Elmo’s Anti-Gender Bender Theory is verifiable, but anecdotal or empirical evidence at least seems to it being a consistency in the behaviour of young otherwise marriageable women.

ADDENDUM:

Seems that Susan Patton, the self-described Princeton Mom, author, speaker, executive coach, and human resources consultant, validates my suspicions:

I sincerely feel that too much focus has been placed on encouraging young women only to achieve professionally…Again, I understand that all women don’t want marriage (to men or other women) and or children, but for those that do, identifying the right partner is critical. One of the criteria by which I am defining the right partner is someone with shared educational and intellectual appreciation. Yes, that can be found after college and outside of Princeton, but the concentration of outstanding men (and women) will never be greater than it is as a student. I wanted to encourage the wonderful young women on Princeton’s campus to take advantage of this while they can. From a sheer numbers perspective, the odds will never be as good again.”

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About elmoshangnaster

The name's a dodge simply because 1) on the internet I can be whomever I choose, and 2) I'm just paranoid enough to keep scoundrels and government out of my business and don't care to sort 'em out from the decent folk. My blog, my opinions. Don't like 'em? Sure, kindly tell me about your far-fetched, idiotic beliefs...kindly. In the end we'll neither of us change the others mind, but I will take the time to read your arguments if they're thought out in a rational fashion and not full of hyperbole. I'm a Christian human being. It's not a flavor or color preference, it's who and what I am. Don't like it? The above considerations apply. I'm not about to waste anyone's time or mine shoving Christianity down their gullet if they demonstrate even the least resistance. When someone's ready to hear I'm only too glad to share. The Gravatar? It's Jenny Lake in the Tetons near Jackson, WY. If God had a house that's where it would be.

Posted on 07/07/2014, in Marriage, Society and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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